I’m writing this at 6pm on Friday, i wanted to get my thoughts written down before i headed to my freinds. I am suppose to be at my flat this weekend, but we cancelled those nights. I will stay with my friends so i can sleep better.
The last two nights have been some of the worst i have had since i moved. It seems 4 weeks of bad sleep is enough to make even being home alone all day difficult.
This isn’t new - my old flat had the same effect - but it is very difficult to manage. A few nights ago i was so exhusted in the evening i had to sit on the bathroom, then bedroom floor for almost an hour before i could dress myself after having a bath. Yesterday afternoon was spent managing a meltdown due to sheer frustration.
These sorts of times are so intensely difficult. I’m spending energy to manage how my body is reacting to the enviroment.
It gets to the point where we just have to stop and take a reset and thats what we’re doing for the next few nights. I will come back on Sunday and we will try another approach. Making things a little simpler and hopefully a little easier.
Autonomy and independence was never going to be easy for me to attain. However, they are important.
This week was hard but there are some big achievements. I went to a new supermarket and coped well, i have managed to get some useful work done and for the most part i have kept things under control. It’s something we can build on.
