Week 72 - It's going pretty well, but its not easy.

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I managed 11 nights in a row based at my flat supported by the Learning Disability team. I’m pretty happy with that! In many ways its remarkable! For the first time in over 4 years i am starting to get towards a stable and sustainable home life.

Last week we have a few really awesome achievements too. For example, we went shopping twice and i managed to make it too my PIP assessment.

The PIP Assessment was a really big achievement. I ended up quite shut down in the end (i spent most of the assessment curled up in the corner!) however i had managed to go somewhere new, in the car with a paid career. That’s a HUGE achievement in such a short space of time.

There are still three key challenges which we are slowly working through but are proving difficult.

The first challenge is that i find it extremely difficult to interact with all but one of the carers. I get very anxious when they visit and mostly hide in my bedroom.

The second challenge is that because i am not entirely relaxed when they visit I don’t sleep so well. The sleep issues then mean i have even less energy for the future interactions and work.

Finally, the anxiety and the sleep issues mean that i am getting trapped in the flat. To tired to go to the cafe during the day, and too anxious to leave my room in the evening. This is very challenging. I like spending time alone, but spending 23.5 hours a day alone for almost 2 weeks at a time is very difficult.

That’s about it really. I have just got back to my flat from a weekend staying with friends and wanted to update my journal before my evening routine started.


Spaced Out & Smiling is about exploring the fun side of Autism, and trying to understand what it means to be Autistically Happy.

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